The Moments

The new beginning

2012-02-09T15:38:00.000+08:00

purplystory.blogspot.com

Empty-hearted

2011-12-14T09:22:00.001+08:00

In some situations, things are difficult to be expressed through words. I had some sleepless night thinking of the same thing over and over. This issue keeps repeating in my mind. I need to get it over with. I won't compromise this time. My decision is final.

p/s: I am solemnly sorry...

Hope

2011-11-23T13:09:00.000+08:00

I wish things could go back to what it was...

p/s: moving forward

Monday Blue

2011-11-21T10:47:00.002+08:00

A friend told me, if people start to envy you, means that you are successful in your work field. They are envy of your talent and your ability which they do not possess themselves. How true is that, I really have no idea. Conflict happens between people. I am not good in dealing with these kind of conflicts. How many people can stick to their own opinion, listen to their own heart and follow their own desire in every circumstances without influence by others? I can't. It's very difficult for me to make a choice for I am definitely not a good decision maker. I really don't like the working environment here now. Things and people are different from the time when I first join the company. Somehow, I can feel that some incident occurs because of me. If I didn't join the company then, people here may be happier than they are now. My existence seems to become a threat for some people in the organization. I tried to avoid this kind of thinking but everything happens for a reason and so to speak, 'I' am the reason behind. I am pretty sure that it's about time for me to change a new working environment. Almost every discontented event occurs because of me indirectly. I choose to leave this organization for good. I choose to leave is not because of anyone. I did it because I think it's time to let go.

p/s: discovering the different me

I want a break

2011-11-14T16:13:00.000+08:00

Can I please have a break tomorrow?

p/s: no pain no gain

13.11.2011

2011-11-13T22:36:00.000+08:00

Saw this from a page in facebook and think this quote is a great

console for those who is still waiting for the right one to pick

on to his/ her ride to eternity ...

p/s: It's actually a great comfort for myself

Fun having Her around

2011-11-08T10:42:00.001+08:00

This is an 'art piece' created by my mother and I in a wedding reception of my cousin. We are just too boring. It's fun having her around. I love her and miss her heaps.

p/s: I love you, Mummy.

1 Nov 2011

2011-11-04T11:28:00.000+08:00

It's a birthday surprise from my brother and his gf.
My brother left this pinky hanging at my door.
Only did I notice it after I took my shower.
Thank you very much guys.
Though it's been the worst birthday ever......
Ignore the 'worst' part because there are always
the good part awaiting.
Texts from friends, blessings on facebook, greetings
from colleagues, phone calls from mother and friends,
birthday song from father, brother and Vince.

The question is still bothering me... should I leave this company or should I stay... There are enough reasons for me to leave but still there are reasons for me to stay. Argh....... I am confused.

Something New

2011-10-31T16:38:00.000+08:00

Have been quite worn out last week.

Had finally realized that working life is not what I have ever thought of.

Something that cheers up me gloomy working life.

Love my nails to the max, thank you very much, Wawa.

Nervous, insecure, unsure

2011-10-26T14:50:00.005+08:00

It is total madness. I always hesitate whether to leave the company now or then. I will have to leave eventually. It is just the matter of time. I know I may face the same old brand new people in a brand new environment. I am afraid. I feel insecure. I know I have to start every single little things from the very beginning. I have to prove I am worth the pay, have to gain trust among new colleagues and boss. I have to learn the new company's operational system. I know these are not easy but everyone is going through these, why can't I? It is not up to me to worry so much about. I am pissed off. Because I felt being disrespectfully treated by some jerk. I can't stand being treated like this constantly.I am frustrated with the ill manner. I can't coordinate with this kind of jerk. I can't stand to be treated like a moron. The company doesn't need me to sustain so what should I care? There are too many jerks out there and just lucky me to have met one.I don't like to lie about the fact that, "never mind how the jerk treat me, I already get used to it, just let the jerk be"

while I actually feel worse after each 'attack'.

And I want the jerk to know that, it's not the cert that matters to the boss,

it's our performance that really matter. For everyone's sake, please

stop bothering me about my qualification.
I am just a d*mn graduate like every other graduate.

That's all and that's it.

p/s: forget about those who hurts because life is already tough

Let me be

2011-10-11T12:38:00.004+08:00

Just let me be spoiled once in a while.
Because there're too much to be
expected. And sometimes things tend
to get out of control. I can still recall
what my boss told me when we lose
in the tender stage. He told me not to hold
things too tight, keep it loose, that is life.
Life is not always perfect.
And you get to fail and fall 99 for times to be successful
for just once. He is my estimation guru. I have to admit without him,
I am still the naive me now though sometimes
I really can't stand his stubbornness.

Let me dream... Things are getting well now, at least for now. I have less

expectation now. Because I am terrified. I feel weak to even think about

the unexpected. Just let things go free. There are too much to be compromised.

There are too much to be planned. There are too much worries. These

are keeping me from moving. Let me stay in this cocoon meanwhile I draft

my 'future'.

p/s: Let me be with myself for the time being...

A New Chapter

2011-10-07T16:20:00.003+08:00

Have been joining the company for 2 years. I learnt that salaries are not always equivalent with the work load. And I can't please everyone in the same time. Even if I am doing my part, some people still tend to cross over the line. Even if I am cool with what I am doing, others may not think the same. I give up. Because making each of them happy means being cruel to myself. I played my role, I fulfill my obligation and that's it. It doesn't matter how others think about me.

I almost ended my six-years relationship with Vince for some stupid reason. I got to talk it out with some friends and that make me feel more guilty and foolish for what I have done. I apologized to Vince. Feeling a bit relieved after that. But still there is a transparent wall that distant us. It's a feeling so to speak. I truly felt that way. I have been giving too much pressure to Vince. And I am really being too selfish comparing to the others. Sorry, I just can't help it. I think every girl deserves to be selfish for this matter. I can't possibly imagine how I went through all of these. I have to admit, my heart is shaken when I said that 'magical' word. For better or for worse, I think both of us grow from this issue. And some friends told me, there are more to come. I hope I have the strength to walk all the way to eternity.

p/s: Love is not always between us, it's between 2 families. And that is what make love magical.

Once upon a time

2011-09-21T22:12:00.000+08:00

Miss every bits of you

2011-09-11T14:36:00.000+08:00

2443 days

Sweet Tooth

2011-09-11T12:56:00.001+08:00

No doubt, I am a marsh-mallow lover. I cannot find the long lost taste in my hometown. Finally discovered its trail ... Though it tasted a bit like melon. Still it did cheer up my day ^^

p/s: wonderful things happened once in a blue moon and that's what make it wonderful

Harmony

2011-09-01T12:34:00.000+08:00

27th August 2011, 11.30 pm, I took a ride in the bus to Kuching. The journey was quite tiring though. Didn't sleep well in the bus. Despite the 'unique' smell of the bus itself, the 'comfy' coach is giving me all the ache in my back and my legs. There were a lot going on in my mind that night. That sleepless night was really driving me crazy... However, I didn't regret that I decided to took a ride in the bus rather than the flight. It's the old and familiar feeling that I tend to experience once again. I closed my eyes most of the time during the journey. Reached Kuching bus terminal station around 10 something in the morning. I can barely walk in a straight line due to the aching of my leg muscle. Took me quite sometime to move through the crowds and finally settle all my bags on an empty bench. Didn't relaxed yet, I kept my vision clear to look for my dearest mum. I was relieved when I saw her familiar face. She didn't saw me, she was trying to dail my number when I saw her. Gave her quite a big shock. I feel homy with her around.

***************************

Took some pictures along the way to Kuching. Some passagers went down occasionally. I was most excited for them as they had eventually reached home. I waited patiently for my turn. The bus by passed a small town called 'Serian'. Some more passangers took off there. The bus was almost empty. Everyone was awakening then, looking out of the window. They looked happy.

Buildings in Serian are old but simple. Just like the citizens, simple and fine.

p/s: I finally felt hapiness for the pass two months...

August Fever

2011-08-21T22:40:00.002+08:00

Haven't been feeling this way since... I don't remember the exact period of time. It's been long I know. I feel emptiness. Somehow, I feel lost. It's like I am not moving forward while the others are taking their chances and just go on with it. Emptiness hits me hard. Recently, I realized that I am a lousy decision maker. People get to live for what they have decided. But I can't stop blaming myself.

I am experiencing the toughest moment in my life now, at this status of my 24 years-life. It's very suffering to spend 24 hours missing someone. I choose to make myself busy rather than to sit back and relax. I tell myself to get a life just to find out at the end that I don't have a life. What a pity. My life used to be colourful with you around. I tried to hypnotize myself that this will end without me even knowing it. Nevertheless, I know that it won't be fast.

I am tired. Just tired. I am not trying to act cool. No matter how people tried to convince me this will be over, deep inside my heart, I feel bad. And I am the biggest moron.

p/s: Will tomorrow really be a better day?

i love you

2011-07-23T10:34:00.000+08:00

time is flying way too fast for me to cope...

he will be going back next week...

but i am starting to miss him already

went to the bank alone to settle my car loan on Thursday

went shopping alone last week

bought my own lunch,

i am starting to adapt to the single life

sounds lonely but hey i am good at that

he has been staying here at bintulu with me for the pass one and

a half years.

see how time flies.

this is probably the question in my heart...

p/s: will you still love me tomorrow?

Lazy Morning

2011-07-23T09:11:00.000+08:00

It's Saturday again...

My New Love

2011-07-19T15:08:00.000+08:00

It's called 'Danboard'.
It's the only thing that cheer up my day in the office.
It's cute.
I just love it.

p/s: there will be a silver lining after every thunder storm.

Confused

2011-07-19T14:26:00.000+08:00

I am really getting more and more confused these days.
Working life is definitely not what I have expected.
Relationship is basically on the rail.
Other than that, I have been thinking about leaving this organization which I worked for no.
However, it's not simply about just leaving.
I am getting very very lazy lately.
Actually I have been tired and unwilling to move on.
My hard works seemed meaningless.

p/s: Laugh out load while you still can...

Highlight of the Month

2011-07-01T15:47:00.000+08:00

My new 4 inches high heels... I simply love them...

My bag, i just love bags...

Miss Those days

2011-06-30T10:39:00.002+08:00

Pictures taken along our way home...

My Weekends

2011-05-12T22:48:00.000+08:00

"Where do you want to hang out today?" Asked Vince.

"Let's go to the beach." I replied.

Then he goes like "Are you sure ? It's pretty hot now...".

I had to convince him to go. He drove there unwillingly though.

He eventually felt relieved.

I have proven the beach is a place to release pressure for he seems to be more relaxed there.

He said the sea breeze brings comfort.

I understand that he is really stressed with works and with the people at workplace but I really do not know a way to release the tension.

I think going to the beach is probably a way to let go for at least a second of what is worrying him in his mind.

I enjoyed every moment I spent with Vince.

But sometimes things just do not always go as you wish.

And that's why letting go is a very important lesson in life.

I am really lucky to have him in my life. He is the last thing I would ever let go of.

Time flies. People change. Memories fade. Only love lasts.

Meeting you has always been the most wonderful thing that have ever happened to me.

You have no idea how much I need you.

p/s: Thank you for everything, dear...

A day-out

2011-04-07T15:07:00.000+08:00

It's pretty amazing how we can stay together with each other for six long years.

I have been really worried that our relationship won't work out.

Now it just prove that I have been thinking too much.

We grow through time, both of us.

Less time are spent together since we are working. I heard from someone saying that

love is poor without memories. Life is not the same since we are working.

Topics of discussion are mostly about work. I know I can't possibly

live without him.

Went to submit a tender on this particular day and met his family. Went shopping

for a while, that photo is taken while he is driving. We are on our way to submit

the tender. The mango ice-cream is really nice. The day before this I finished off

work at 1:30 a.m. and continued my day in the office at 6.30 a.m. Though I was

pretty wiped out, I still love my day.

p/s: Thank you for loving me for who I am...

A Day to Memorize

2011-03-23T13:39:00.000+08:00

This is how my table looks like last week. It's been like this for almost a month. There's been a war. I am really about to exceed my maximum last week. Working late everyday from monday to sunday. Who can possibly stand that? I will never forget this month. A lot had happened. It's been craft deep to my memory. This is an important lesson in my life. Thank you for giving me this opportunity to try out.

p/s: "Hard work keeps the wrinkles out of your face and mind"

The Office

2011-01-15T08:47:00.000+08:00

This is the d*mn place where i spend my 8 hours from Monday to Saturday. I purposely edit it to be in black and white. Because this is how i feel about it. It would be colourful someday in the future, I suppose. I have been feeling oddly depressed recently. I can't explain the feeling. I suppose many people around me have had this kind of confusion. Thinking that it's meaningless working day and night, struggling to finish off the works, staying up late in countless nights, at the end of the day all u get is exhaustion. This place was my dream but it turns to be my nightmare.

p/s: Good Luck to all Workaholics, Cheers ~

Happy 2011

2011-01-11T09:46:00.001+08:00

Sitting in the office, feeling very confused. Perhaps I don’t belong here. Isn’t this my home? This question has been playing inside my head over and over. Perhaps I shouldn’t have come here at the first place. Throughout the year, I learnt that it’s difficult to please every single person around you. And you get to live with your mistakes. And no matter how hard you strike to get through, you will end at the same spot.

My job seems to be the only obsession that I can find my satisfaction in. I don’t mind having tones and tones of work load. I can stay in the office all day long just to keep myself busy. I realized that nothing can be perfect. Maybe I should just find sometimes for myself. Be alone, stay empty-minded, relax, relocate my thoughts, reschedule my plans, reset my goals for this year, find myself some entertainment and find myself a hobby perhaps. Could it be that I haven’t been honest enough to myself. Or could it be that I have been too aggressive. Have been trying so hard to stick as close to my principle as possible. And this seems to be a mission impossible.

I have summarized a wishlist to myself.

First of all, to get a really good camera.

Secondly, plan for a trip to KK. (Have been dreaming about this day and night)

Third, to upgrade myself more and hopefully to complete my dissertation.

4th, to have my bank account loaded.

No. 5, to buy an elegant necklace for my mother.

Make it just 5 for now.

p/s: To love crazily while you still can ...

Love is Fragile

2010-12-08T02:14:00.000+08:00

There is time when I doubted your love and there is time when I doubted my love towards you...
There is time when I doubted love itself...
Is it true that we are just too afraid to get into a new relationship that we choose to stuck with each other?
I want to believe that there is only me that you are thinking about...
But how far is that true?
How can you be sure that there is nobody except me?
If you love me deeply now, can you make sure to love deeper or still keep the warmth next year and the year after next and so and so?
I am afraid... I don't know how to react to love...
Things change, people change, the world is changing everyday, how can you be so sure that your love towards me is never-changing?

2069 Days

2010-11-25T09:12:00.001+08:00

We have been through 2069 days. We changed. We grow.
Thank you for the patience, the understanding, the love and lots of tolerance. Thank you.

p/s: Let love lead the way.

Happy Birthday to ME

2010-11-01T10:30:00.001+08:00

November the 1st.

It's been 24 years when I first realized that I have been waiting for the surprise in my life.

Life has been tough.

I should pampered myself once in a while.

I am craving my life path for what I think is right.

When there's a need to change, changes should be made.

For better or for worse, let you be the one to decide.

I love, I hate, I laugh, I cry, I fight, I run, I enjoy, I suffer,

I am just being me.

p/s: Happy Birthday to me...

29 Oct 2010

2010-10-29T23:30:00.000+08:00

Going to be 24 after couple of days. What did i achieve last year when i was 23? I won the first tender for my boss with his help and colleagues'? I don't call this an achievement though. My big boss did make me feel bad about this by asking whether I miscalculate something or not. It's all my bad, either miss a tender or get a project. What can I say? You are the boss. You are always the big time winner.

Went out with Irene just now, had a great time with her. It's been a long time since our last gathering. We had a great time updating each other bout our present life. She is my best friend. And I really wish that she can find her prince, get her happiness. I knew Irene for 10 years already. It's been long. She has always been one of my close friends, love her very much.

I feel helpless recently. Frankly speaking, I feel small. At this very moment you maybe the on top of the world but you will never know that the next minute you may be upside down. My conclusion is that my life = work + work + tonnes and tonnes of unfinished works!!!

p/s: I am learning to love my life, I am learning to let go...

Workaholic

2010-10-01T22:20:00.000+08:00

It's 9.53 pm. I feel like suffocating in the world of grown-ups. Maybe I am just being naive. It took me two to three days the most to finish up one earthwork calculation. But now I have been doing it over for about a week and I still haven't complete it yet. I have lost my passion for work. I asked my boss one stupid question. "What is the meaning of working if at the end of the day all you left is exhaustion?" His answer is " Life is difficult. Working is tiring but behind the exhaustion you gain knowledge, your gain experience, your may find your interest of doing something that you are good at, you will learn the meaning of life." And my feedback is "Boss, can you please tell me something that I don't really know?" I know and I do understand deeply about he wants to emphasize to me. Thank you, Boss! Thanks a lot for your kind advice.
My boss got a call from SOP saying that we have been shortlisted for the tender and there are still some addendum to be done. I have been doing this over and over and the outcome is being kicked out eventually. I am so pissed off already! Take it or leave it! Why can't you just award it to us? I think I am really the one with problem if this tender is not awarded to us. I should prepare my resignation letter. I am really not suitable for this job. Sorry!

There's a saying goes, " Life is not just about breathing, life is about how many breathe you take in a minute."

When today becomes yesterday

2010-07-09T21:17:00.000+08:00

Woke up at 6.45am this morning, hang up the clothes to dry, take a glass of milk, have an apple, take my morning shower, choose my outfit, tied up my hair, take a couple of look in the mirror and went off to work. On and off, day and night, this is my life.
Since the day I start to work, I have been thinking is this the life I have been wanting for. I am lost. I feel insured. I feel mistaken.

June is Here

2010-06-05T16:55:00.000+08:00

I have been a member of this construction firm for one year since this May 2010. I entered 4th of June 2009 and one whole year is gone. Achievement is not what I call. I should have pedal harder with all my might. Or I could have learn more. Thank you, Sir. Thank you for all the lessons you taught me. Something changed. Am I too afraid to accept the change or am I just not prepared? I doubt myself. I hope I won't disappoint you.
I told myself many times not to fall for what other people say. Because they might just add some seasonings to the original story. But I can't help to think about it over and over. The more I think, the more it hurts. I know this sounds stupid but I just can't help it. Grow up, girl! Face it! Welcome to the adult world of fantasy!
Why is it so difficult just to do your job and play your own role? Please don't enter into the territory where you are not suppose to step in.
I am truly upset and lost. Should I or should I not? Am I being too firm? I need to talk to someone, I really need to talk from A to Z out loud.

p/s: Please don't underestimate me and Never overestimate me...

Little Surprize You Gave Me

2010-05-28T14:14:00.000+08:00

This little surprise really made my day... Thank you, dear.

p/s: everyone needs love.

Am I thinking too much?

2010-05-24T21:25:00.000+08:00

i have always dream to build a comfy home of my own.

to have a small house designed by us.

but now this dream is not so pronounced.

reality is just too heavy to face.

most of the times your silence and the emptiness in your eyes are killing me.

deep inside my heart i feel like i can't hold on any longer.

i want to run away.

away from home, away from work, away from you.

you are confusing me.

but

i love you

does not seems so much

to you

Tired is not an Excuse

2010-04-15T20:27:00.005+08:00

Attention!

Tender Closing Date:

1. 16th April 2010

2. 19th April 2010

3. 26th April 2010

I started my year 2010 without taking a good rest.
I am beginning to ask myself is this what I really want.
Though I am living my everyday to its fullness.
I have a confession to make.
I am hell TIRED!!!
If I could just put away my job now, I wish to go to have a spa.
I want to go shopping.
I want to shop without having to look at the price tag.
I am about to burst.

p/s: I am learning to love my life...

Our Night Out

2010-04-09T21:04:00.002+08:00

Did went out with Vince alone for quite sometime already... Miss those days... Meeting him has always been a miracle in my life... He is my happiness, now and for-ever... Thank you, Vince.

Pressure!!!

2010-04-09T20:53:00.005+08:00

Tender Closing Date:

1. 7th of April
2. 14th of April
3. Examination on the 29th of April

I only have a week to finish off each of the tender. Coming up with some more small additional variation works to be remeasure and re-calculate. I am piled with works. I am working and working and only working for this month. I am about to burst! I am overloaded! I am really exhausted! I need rest! I want to yell...

Day 1

Day 2

and I don't have any more time for photo taking after Day 2.

Random

2010-04-04T12:01:00.001+08:00

Sometimes I tend to forgot how simple happiness can be...

Time Flies

2010-03-28T13:10:00.002+08:00

Sometimes when you come across this, it's already too late. Hold the sand tight in your palm for it will still leak through your fingers. Then just so be it.

Blue Morning

2010-03-18T10:33:00.002+08:00

Sitting at the cafe waiting for the waiter to take order but no one seems to notice our existence. Fine. After half an hour, we placed an order. 10 minutes later, the waitress came and asked have we order, then what's the order... Fine... I lost my appetite already. Starting off with an empty stomach makes my day worse...

WHO

2010-03-13T11:48:00.000+08:00

... can ensure me E.T.E.R.N.I.T.Y ?

I need A Change

2010-03-08T10:51:00.003+08:00

I want to get out of here. I don't have the sense of belonging here. I don't like to be controlled. I don't want to be a puppet! I will go away someday. Planning to go far away, planning to leave home for this time round the 'home' is not where I love to stay. This 'home' is not what it used to be. I hate the feeling of not being able to make a change for all of these... I don't want it to be this way! I want things to back to what it was.

p/s: L.O.V.E conquers all!!!

My Support For-Ever

2010-02-26T16:29:00.004+08:00

It's really cool to have a family like what I am having.
They are my backbone behind each of my story of success.
They complete my life and still counting.
Every time when I think I can't make it through, they are there to lead the way.
And not forgetting my brother (Xiang), I love you too though you are always the pain in the neck which I can't get rid of.
I love my family.
It's nice to have you around.

This post is specially dedicated to my family.

With Love,

your daughter...

Sorry seems to be the hardest word

2010-02-24T16:12:00.003+08:00

I am sorry. Sorry for bringing
you into all of this. Sorry for being
selfish. Sorry for being not understanding.
Sorry for being immature. I am fool. I still
can't figure out what is the best for our
future. I don't know what is your
concern. It seems like I never
tend to ask. I never tend
to care. I am not in
the mood for
anything
at
the moment.
Deep inside my heart, you are my life.
You made my day, always. Letting go is not easy.
Please do remind me when I cross over the line.
At this instance,
I think I need you more than you need me.

L.O.V.E

2010-02-08T20:52:00.002+08:00

What is love?
Have been asking myself over and over...
Who will I be with if he is not Vincent?
Will I be loved?
Will I love?
It's almost 5 years.
I always ask him is he getting bored of me?
His answer is always no!
But how long can this feeling last?
He said he is not sure too...
Is marriage really a brand new start of our love journey or it's the grave of our love story? Who can give me the answer to this question?
Is it still love or is it already a responsibility after ten years?
All I know is I love, I care, I worry for him few years back and now I still do.

Friday

2010-01-29T09:33:00.004+08:00

Apparently I have been too busy to update this page.
Just closed a tender yesterday, one more big one coming soon.
I feel pretty wipe out after every tender. It's all about BQ,
summary of tender, schedule of rates, the rates... It sucks!!!
Tomorrow will be the last day of January.
What have you accomplished?
Life is not all
about you. It's not always wonderful.
It's not always beautiful.
It's not always blue.
It wont't be necessarily exciting.
But the clock is still ticking, time is still passing,
life still goes on.

Complicated

2010-01-11T10:22:00.003+08:00

Have been thinking...
What can I do to change the current situation.
Am I making the right decision?
Am I missing something important?

p/s: Life is short, enjoy while you still can...

D*mn It!

2010-01-01T15:01:00.006+08:00

It's been a tough week. I am getting bored of my straight long hair. It's time to have a change. I think I need a new bag, a new pair of shoes, a couple of new outfit or a new life.

It's been blue throughout the week. My boss is driving me crazy, I know most of the boss is like that. But now I just want to ignore him all the while. Because he is being ridiculous, arrogant, disrespectful, talking like he is someone who is really keen in what he is doing (this I agree), noisy, acting like he is on the top of the world and now I just want to stop thinking about him. He said the 3 QSs he hired are not aggressive enough. He said we should go to look for good tenders and come back to him and said "boss, I want us to get this tender!". Then he began to pick on me. He started off with "Miss Kiew, never think that you have a master degree then you are good already!", then "Miss Kiew, academic is just a basic of what you are doing now. Academic itself actually has no much help in your career. You can't learn everything in the uni. You are lack of experience. ( I know that and that's what I am trying to get now)", after a little while he continued to remind me that having a cert is not everything... and more on the topic that having a cert is not everything, Miss Kiew this, Miss Kiew that. He said he worked really hard when he was young to stand where he is standing now. He wants us to set him as a role model. Just stop all these nonsense, please. I don't want to stand in his position. And I never will see him as my role model because my father is better off. Well, excuse me, I never ever think that I am good with a cert! Neither did I tell my colleagues that I got a cert. He is the one who introduced me as the new QS lady with a master degree to everyone!!!

About not being aggressive, that really pissed me off. What does he meant by not being aggressive? If I were to be not aggressive enough, now I am just a small account clerk or an admin clerk with a Form Six qualification, not a QS with a mater qualification. I turned my parents down to go further study, I got myself a diploma and then went off to get a bachelor of degree. After that I convinced my father to let me complete a master program and at the end of the day I was commented of being not aggressive! Now, tell me what is aggressive.

I hate being looked down and I will prove him wrong. I want him to regret what he had said about me. Like he said, I am still young, how can he conclude that I do not have any plannings for my near future? Never expect me to get involved in this company for a protracted time, never!!!

I am exhausted. My dark circles and eye bags are haunting me. I feel like dying...

p/s: Happy New Year!!! Year 2010, a brand new year, a brand new life!!!

101

2009-12-07T11:21:00.007+08:00

I have 101 things in my mind right now.

Thinking bout my achievement at this status,

my career (though I don't quite like it & I don't think it as a career,

it's rather a chore that I have to carry out everyday),

my dream ( which I doubt whether I still have any),

my requirement,

and myself...

I miss those good old times.

p/s: I am wandering what's my passion for life ...

Happiness is Free But...

2009-12-03T09:07:00.005+08:00

Growing up is to adopt a whole new life style.

Growing up means waking up from

fairy tales in the

hard way.

People tend to forget how to be happy,

how to be satisfied, how to relax...

When everything is about somebody else,

life becomes meaningless, colourless and vain.

I have always wanted to get away. I have always wanted to hide.

I always think why things have to be so difficult for me.

I tend to forget that I am apt to be happy too.

p/s: what would life be without colour...

Working Day

2009-11-20T09:08:00.004+08:00

Guess what, I am at my office now...

I have been calculating earthwork and earthwork and more earthwork since the pass 2 weeks.

Earthwork sucks!!! I was piled with loads and loads of drawings and BQs and bill summary to be done. Today I am free and bored.

Vince is working in the same company with me now. I get to see him almost everyday during lunch break. I can't deny, I am happy to see him. Friends who see our relationship grow are happy for us too. Thank you so much.

No more long distance relationship for us temporary...

p/s: Frankly speaking, I need a break...

The Beginning of A New Chapter In My Life

2009-09-21T17:15:00.003+08:00

I have been abandon this blog for ... I do know, maybe 3 months...

Eventually have the time to update it. I have been working very hard

over the past 3 months. Battling to meet the due date of tenders, setting

up new goals to be achieved, trying pretty hard to fit in among my

colleagues, all this and that is all to cope up with my new living style and

the bottom line is that 'WORKING SUCKS!!!'

I have been quite emotional over the past few weeks...

Sorry to those who are worried about me and

I promise to treat myself better.

It's been really hard for me over these past few weeks. I find it difficult to

love my life now. Though I have plenty of complaints back then

during my student life, this is very much different.

Every now and then I wish that time will reverse, reverse back to

the time when I was still studying in Sibu...

I will love my life...

I hope...

But I doubted it...

Is there anyone who can give me a time machine as a gift? I really hope to own one myself...

Day 3 @ Kuching

2009-05-31T00:01:00.005+08:00

My mum and I took the bus from Bintulu on the 28th of May
2009 to Kuching. The bus was supposed to arrive at 11.30 pm
that night but it delayed. It's already 12.30 am when
the bus arrived. We reached Kuching sometime
around 11am. At first our intention of coming
to Kuching was to pay my bros a little visit
and will go back to Bintulu on the 2nd
of June but since mummy got a job invitation
here at Kuching, she has to stay here and I will stay
here at Kuching too. And now thing is changing again...
I am going back on the 1st of June to have an interview.
It's really exhausting. But what to do?
I need a job. If the company accepts me, I will be
separating with my mother. This is the very first time
I go back home not seeing my mum. I feel heavy. I really
hate to separate with her. I don't want to separate with my mum.
I want to take care of her, I want to stay with her forever...
Why can't life be much easier?Neither do I want to separate with you...

Wish me luck, guys!!!

Packing!!!

2009-05-13T21:05:00.002+08:00

I will be going home on this coming Saturday, on the 16th.

Have to pack all my things and I am really worried that
my luggages will over weight.Have to pay RM15 per
kg of over weight!!! Will be home in no time...
Having a mixed feeling of excitement,
emptiness, relief... And we will be
separating once again ...
This time the time
frame is
unpredictable...
Experiencing and have to live with LDR once again...
It feels like yesterday since we first met...

I will be missing you heaps!!!

Boring Life Part 2

2009-05-10T12:33:00.008+08:00

I decided to have pancakes for breakfast this morning.

And due to boredom, I took a few pictures of the
process of making pancakes...

This is the pancake mixture (ready-mix one).
All I have to do is to mix the powder with
adequate amount of water

This is how the pancakes look like before it's not cooked.

They are almost done. (Though they're a bit burnt).

Though the look is not very selling, they tasted just ok...

P/S: Happy Mother's Day to ALL...

I smell HOLIDAY

2009-05-06T12:25:00.001+08:00

I am officially on holiday now...
But I still have to do my dissertation...
A topic is to be chosen first...
A proposal is to be submitted and approved...
Only then I can start with my dissertation...
I am still in study mode...
Never thought that time will be passing by in such speed...
Need to look up for job...
Employment in this economic downturn period is almost
impossible...
But do I have a choice?I have to decide where to work...
It's very irritating, annoying, troublesome, confusing, sick...
Whatsoever you want to name it...

Growing up is life of fading colours accompanied with lonesome

Exam Fever

2009-04-30T15:02:00.004+08:00

Have been pretty busy later...

Just finished one paper yesterday...
And now preparing for the other one...
One more paper to go then I will have to start
with my dissertation...
Just moved out last few
days...Now staying at a
friend's place...I like it here...
Though I have to sleep in the living room...
I just like it here...The people are nice,
the kitchen is clean...
And most importantly,
I don't have to face
those stupid kids...
I don't need anyone to tell me what to do so just get the heck out off my sight !!!

My Housemate

2009-04-21T22:59:00.006+08:00

Let me introduce to you my housemate...

This morning when I entered into the kitchen, I found this... As you can see clearly in the picture shown, the stove is flooded with water. I purposely put the picture to large size so that you can have a clearer view. How can you not be annoyed?! Hello, if you spilt the water all over the place sure you will wipe it with a cloth. This is how a normal person would act... But my housemate totally IGNORE it!!! For your information, I already cleaned the stove few days back, if not, this will not be the scene you see. What you will see is a stove covered with some dried rice, piece of hotdog, a layer of oil, few drops of dry soya sos and then plus today's water. Come on, I already cleaned the stove (let me remind you again, I am the only one who clean the stove in this house as my housemate and I, we are the only 2 who use the kitchen often), why don't you just clean up your own mess... I am pretty sure that you hands won't broke and it won't hurt!!! This is not the first d*mn thing she did that annoyed me... I am faded up with her and her roommate and the friend... Because they are the source of noise pollution in this house!!! She speaks turkish (short form of turkey english) loudly everyday with the mother. I can't understand what she is trying to say...I don't mean to eavesdrop their conversation, the fact is that I can still hear her with my door shut!!! For God's sake, please lower down you volume, you don't need peace, somebody else need!!! Despite of taking up all the spaces at the balcony for hanging out clothes and the spaces to put shoes and the spaces in the kitchen and the spaces in the fridge... ... I promise you there are more to come... Just stay tune... And thanks heaps for your precious time and attention to read this sh*t about my houesemate... I am being polite not to call them b*tches.......

Here are a couple of pictures of my flooded stove... Enjoy!!!

P/S: I HATE MY HOUSEMATES THAT LIVE NEXT DOOR!!! MY ADVICE TO HER IS TO IMPORVE THE ENGLISH PLEASE, I AM NOT BLUFFING, EVEN PRIMARY SCHOOL KIDS HAVE BETTER ENGLISH PRONUNCIATION THAN SHE HAS!!! SERIOUSLY~~

Emotional

2009-04-19T11:42:00.014+08:00

Sometimes these graphics... They speak... for you...

Buddy UpClose 2

2009-04-17T21:04:00.003+08:00

He has always been so adorable, how can one not love him???
I truly heart him...

Misery

2009-04-17T15:52:00.003+08:00

I feel

Messed up

Unpampered

Uncertainty

Worried

Lonesome

Laziness

Lost

Harassed

Pain

Irritated

I am exhausted... Because no one seems to appreciate...

Despressed

2009-04-11T23:45:00.003+08:00

Everything is so wrong. Everything is so misplaced. Nothing makes any sense now. Why do I need to go through these? My mind is now blank. My heart is melting. My life is a mess right now. I am about to crumble. I tried to cry but my eyes are dry. I have no idea how long I can undertake these. I want to get out of my life. But there is nowhere to hide. I feel like I don't belong here. There is no place for me here. I am still not ready for these. I am a coward, I admit. I am afraid to face it.

Please let me walk through these with courage

The World is Very Sick

2009-03-29T23:00:00.004+08:00

Long before this, I have a very immature thinking of that everyone in this world is very nice, they should be very friendly, but now that I know it is just a stupid thought. People nowadays are very self-centred, they think of themselves before anyone else, they are egoistic, they talk nonsenses, they are not understanding, they don't tolerent, most of them are uncivilized, they have no manner, they are rude, they are hypocritical, they thought they are the fairest of them all, they are swallow, they are immature, they are lazy, they have no cleanliness sense, they act stupid, they are just immature... I felt so small when I am around these people, I am helpless, I am lonely, I am invisible, I will vanish with the air...

I am just being me

My Love Department

2009-03-26T23:31:00.008+08:00

26th of March is a vital date for boyfriend and I. Though boyfriend
is a not-so-romantic guy, no doubt I am happy to be with him.
After a short discussion, we have decided to go back to
Fullhouse for a lunch. Prior to this, he decided
to bring me to Sakea Sushi for the
celebration but somehow it is
over-budget. It's alright
for me though,
as long as
we have each other.
Here are some amendment I made for the pictures...

Four years have not been easy though.
We went through long distance relationship for
more than one year and will be going through it in the
near future.However, I am willing to give it a try for another
4 years or longer.

It is truly a blessed day for the two of us yesterday as the
rain came pouring down half an hour after we got
home. What a relief.

Thank you for making this day happens ...

My WishList

2009-03-23T15:10:00.004+08:00

I seriously need these things though some are my wants. LOL. But frankly speaking a girl's closet is always lack of a pair of trousers, a blouse, a t-shirt, a dress, a pair of shoes... ... ... "Enough" is not in my dictionary. =P

1. A nice and durable umbrella. {A need}
2. A pair of shoes, sandals maybe. { A need ^^}
3. A jacket. {A need}
4. A pair of jeans. {A want but I haven't buy jeans since last year}
5. A dress. {A want but the one I want is very X2 nice}
6. One more bag pls. {This is definitely a want... So?}
7. A personal driver.{A dream}
8. A personal stylish. {A dream}
9. A personal cook to fulfill all my desires for food.{A serious dream}
10. A servant. {Definitely all girls wants}
If I keep on with the list, trust me it will never end...

The picture speaks a thousand words ~ Go the way your heart desires~

Love Story

2009-03-22T15:20:00.004+08:00

It's been 3 years-11 months and 26 days.

4 more days and it will officially be our 4th year anniversary.
Don't ask me whether or not I am excited to celebrate our official 1,460 days together.
Because boyfriend is definitely not a romantic guy. I have a bunch full of proves of his unromantic history. For example on the Valentine's Day, he didn't
buy flower for me as he thinks it's waste of money; when
I finally saw the dress I have been longing for
and I can't quite afford now then
he said "never mind, I will pay
half for the dress..." instead
of buying it for me to give
me a surprise...; and I
never had any
surprises in
the pass
3 years...
So this is why I don't have
much
expectation...
Despite of those unromantic history,
boyfriend is still a very touching guy sometimes.
He carries my bag whenever I said I am tired though my bag makes him look sissy.
He sweeps my room and mops the floor. He gives me messages whenever I need it.
He makes me laugh whenever he sees me in gloom. He prepares
my shower water for me everyday.
He cooks my lunch on most of the
weekends. He is
being supportive whenever I need
his support. He is like my guardian
angel. He never knew how grateful I am for
I have him by my side for always. He stays with
my during my gloomy days. He is there in my every sleepless night.
He has a strong passion for Gandum, Kamen Rider, basketball, Japanese animations,
games and FOOD. He is a ten-year-old kid in a 23 years old body.
Out of many of the above reasons, the bottom line is that I Love Him.

Optometry

2009-03-17T09:50:00.002+08:00

Yesterday I became a patient for my friend who is doing optometry. She is having a test yesterday thus she asked me to help and it is really my honour. She will be the future to be optometrist. However she hates that. Well, it was a great experience for me.

The optometry test lab is located at the 8th floor. Once I entered into the building, all I saw is green! I was surrounded by GREEN. LOL. I don't quite like green personally thus this comment is a personal one. And there are a lot of doors. What I mean is 5 to 6 in just one single room. Despite that, all the future-to-be optometrists are very professional. Actually an eye test is not a new thing to me for I am wearing specs myself. Yesterday, my friend really impressed me. The tests they carried out are a detailed evaluation of human eyes. She used an equipment (that is what I called it) which looks like a special torch light to look right into my pupils and to see my nerves. This process is a very exhausting one for the two of us as I have to keep my eyes wide open and stare hard at a point and she has to stare hard into the tool and check my nerves. Both of us were sweating after this test though the lab has a centralized air-conditioning system. According to her, the tool is used to check the health of nerves of the patient. And mine are in a good physical shape.

The test lasted for 2 hours plus. Though I just sit there, it was still strenuous. By contrast, it was a pretty amazing experience for me. One more thing, I have to go back for the test next monday and this time the lecturer wants to test me. I hope everything goes smoothly then.

Eventually ^^

2009-03-07T17:04:00.006+08:00

I have been stuck in the condo for 2 weeks or so... excluding going to school, go out to have my daily meals, going to do weekly groceries. Life starts to get bored. And finally I went to the Curve this morning!!! Oh, you have no idea how delighted I am.

Boyfriend brought home half dozen of cupcakes. I have been longing for this cupcake since last year... Eventually I get to taste it. Here is the cupcakes.

This is the content of the little box...

I bought this at a really cheap price, surprisingly. Juicy looking strawberries, I hope them are not too sour to taste.

Done with the food for the satisfaction for my appetite, and here are these food for my tired skin.

What a day. After this I have to be immovable again in this condo until I complete my academic reports. Well, at least I still have this day to have down pat. Cheers ^^

What happen?

2009-02-23T17:39:00.002+08:00

Last week I lost my bottle of ketchup and peeler then today I lost a pack of vege!!!! Oh my god, don't u know what u just bought from the market??? Why can't u recognize what u bought??? really pissed me off!!!! don't tell me u don't know what you bought!!!! This is ridicuous!!!! Unacceptable!!! And I also happen to lost an egg... I put it at the sink and then it disappeared into the air!!!!!!!!!!! curse u!!!!!!!!!!!!

Once In a Blue Moon

2009-02-16T23:18:00.002+08:00

I am sick...
Running nose, pain in the muscle, headache, dizziness ...
Hate being sick!
I have an assignment to be submitted within 2 weeks time and I haven't even started yet!
I am so not in the mood to do it but I have no choice.
Can't sleep well because of the extremely hot weather here.
Moreover something really strange happened in the place I stay.
At first I lost my fruit peeler then I lost the whole bottle of ketchup (let me remind you, I only used it for couple of times). So, what's next? My cup, my plate ... ... ARG... whatsoever !!!
Just bought a new ketchup and this time I wrote name on it so that it won't disappear into the air AGAIN !!!

A Love Like No Others

2009-02-04T09:59:00.005+08:00

The Lunar Year celebration is too short for me. Or maybe it is just that time is passing too fast. If I put it this way, telling myself that time is passing by like a rocket's speed and not that the holiday is short, I will probably feel better, I guess. Or not, never mind.

Yes, I will be going off in a couple of days. And this time when I come home, I will be graduating. Wow, what a relief. But also means double up the burden on my shoulder, double up the time for burning the midnight oil, minus twice the time for me to rest, fooling around, eat, watching movies, and every other things, double up the stress!!!!!! Oh, I am about to panic, crumble, burst, and maybe fainted.

Apart from all of those unpleasant and scary possibilities, I am most grateful I have my supportive and lovely family. Thank you, Grandpa, Grandma, Father, Mother and Brothers.

P/s: I am the author of my life, unfortunately I can't erase my mistakes or overwrite my past ...

I will reach home in no time!!!

2009-01-18T22:30:00.004+08:00

Excited, I am very excited right now.
Words are just not enough to describe how I feel right now.
It's Chinese New Year.
You have no idea how much I miss home.
Since that day when my mum using all her resources to search for me, she went to my friend's office to ask for my bf's number, called my cellphone for like 20 over times, even my dad was calling me for uncountable times... Just because I left my phone in my bag after coming back from shopping, moreover, I set my phone to silent mode... Oh My God, I really scared the shit out of my parents especially my beloved mother. She called my bf and he was having class then. She asked he to tell me to give her a call when he sees me after his class. Instead of waiting for the class to end, he ran to look for me that instance. I am really sorry for that. Please everyone who is involved in this 'searching for kiew hieling' activity (Irene, Jimmy), accept my apology... I promise this will never happen again.

Just now, around 5pm, I received a sms from kim, she asked my to be her patient for she is doing optometry practice. She is the future to be optometrist. But she said she will not be an optometrist. She wants to open a pastry shop. I will always support her decisions. Hope to catch up with her during this holiday.

My Weekends

2009-01-11T23:53:00.007+08:00

For shoppers, Saturdays and Sundays are more than perfect for shopping!!! And the food always plays an important role to made the day. We had Taiwanese food on Saturday.

This is my XXL crispy chicken chop. It is huge but it does not taste as it appears to be.

His chicken chop set with bean curb

A side dish - Omelet rolls

Mango Ice-cream which is quite costly.

This is what we had for Sunday. I am sick and tired of fast foods thus we went to have something instead of fast foods.

I had a Japanese style noodle with fried pork pieces. And

He had a clay-pot 'lao shu fen' (direct translation from Chinese words).

Back to Action

2009-01-06T00:48:00.004+08:00

School started at 3rd of Jan. Everything went peacefully.

Wandering why am I still up here writing this blog? Well, it's simply because I don't feel sleepy. I had a very long siesta this afternoon. Shouldn't do that next time.

This entry is simply a random posting...

I am hell BORED!!!!

Let the BOREDOM go awayyyyy!!!!

Summary of 2008

2008-12-31T23:31:00.002+08:00

Time passes,
have you ever thought of what have you achieve in this year?
Graduate...
Promotion...
Salary increasing...
Get a driving license...
Bought a new house/ car or both...
A new boy/girlfriend...
Loss/Gain some weight...
There are too much to be recalled.

When you gain, in the mean while you also lost.
And what have you lost in this year?

When you sit back and think quietly alone, many memories may flash through
Sweet memories, bad memories, those you wished would never happen
Why can't we choose to remain the good ones and delete the bad ones from our mind?
Time can cure any sadness, there is a saying which goes like this
But
Is it true?
Can time really cure any of those depression?
It's very subjective...
For those who lost their love ones, time is not going to lessen the pain and bring away the gloom
When time passes they miss their love ones even more...

Last but not the least
Happy 2009 and Farewell 2008

p/s: say whatever you want to say now because tomorrow maybe one day late...
To my family, I love you all
To my friends, I love you all
To the boyfriend, I love you too

Chirtsmas O Christmas

2008-12-26T22:22:00.018+08:00

What are required for this merry season?

Christmas tree is definitely a must for Christmas season.

AND

Couple of bus tickets

A bunch of friends to hang out

A prosperous meal and thriving drinks

Perhaps dessert before heading home

AND OF COURSE

A gift from the boyfriend

To give a stunning ending for this marvelous season, a final touch

PERHAPS

Couple of vodkas served chilled

P/s: Merry Christmas People

A Stroll @ The Curve

2008-12-19T19:22:00.004+08:00

I am officially of holidays!!! I like to go out on weekdays for I do not have to bear with the crowds... I can do that because I am still a student now... Enjoy my uni life... And the daily stroll ends with these...

A fresh rose ** I was thrilled... Thanks!

Photo sticker taken then heading to movie... What a blissful day it is...

Confused. Frustrated. What-so-ever.

2008-12-11T21:06:00.003+08:00

Exam sucks...
My life... sucks even more...
The bottom line is that I am
Frustrated...
Annoyed...
Confused...
Sick...
Exhausted...
Out of a sudden all the things seem meaningless to me...
What's wrong with me?
Don't ask...
Because I don't know it myself...

Everything is so out of order...
I want to get the heck out of here...
I can't breathe...
Choking...
I'm helpless...
I want to be gone...

A Place Like No Others - Fullhouse

2008-12-08T09:03:00.012+08:00

No idea where to go during weekends or the special day... Fullhouse is definitely the place...
I have been dying of wanting to come here since the first time I discover this place, but I don't enjoy not even a bit. All because of the crowd and the noise. Out of a sudden this peaceful little hideout become so hectic, so happening, and so packed with people. Despite that, I still prefer this white and home-like tea house...

Christmas is just around the corner

The board said "Merry Christmas and Happy New Year"

The food is just fine but I love the drinks

This is the wall finished with painting and bf is quite impressed with the painting

Looking at this remind me it's time to go, happy moments do not last forever but memories do...

~One more secret ingredient for the memory soup~

Buddy, Up-Close

2008-12-06T22:01:00.004+08:00

Took these pictures this afternoon while I was doing my notes for the exam... He behaves today that's how I managed to take close picture of him...

Look at his cute face, who would not fall for him...

Feels good to have him around=)

~The New Member~

2008-12-04T15:41:00.007+08:00

He belongs to my housemate. We call him 'Buddy'. He is still a puppy, a shy and naughty puppy. He is acting like a 5 month old kid, putting everything inside his mouth and intends to swallow them, though he is 5 month-old himself. I am very fond of him the 1st day I met him but he was just the opposite. However, now this is not the case, he loves me too. He follows where ever I go and stay beside me (even if his owner is home)...

Bf does not like him too much for he dislike every fury living creatures. He told me when I went to take my shower, Buddy is scrolling at the door of the bathroom waiting for me. It's true because whenever I open the bathroom door after shower or what-so-ever, I will see him waiting there...

I only managed to take these few pictures of him yesterday. Because he was too reckless due to stomachache I think... Because he throw up and dispose a lot yesterday. Thank God today he is fine ...

Unbearable

2008-12-03T15:16:00.005+08:00

The lift is still damaged!!! It has been four or five months I think... The management promised that the lift will be fixed at the end of November but today is already the 3rd of Dec!!! The time taken to fixed the lift is too long until the warning board also worn out its functional life... This is the hell I stay!!!

A Promise. Be-lated Birth Present

2008-11-30T22:16:00.007+08:00

After months of assignment-struggling, I need some relaxation ... It's time for shopping... I suggested to go to Sunway Pyramid... As he promised, a bag for me when he got his salary from the part time job he did few months back... This is what I got... I am not a fan for green but this one touches my heart... And I haven't use up my quota yet!!! Which means I can still shop for more... Thanks bf!

Look at the design of the plastic bag. Simply entertaining.

The content of the plastic bag

A mickey mouse carry bag it is

Walt Disney, it's meant for me...

Due to the fundamental rule of time, live life to its fullness*

Completion

2008-11-28T21:05:00.002+08:00

I have finished my assignment finally!!! Hand in tomorrow but the suffering just begins...

2008-11-19T09:27:00.003+08:00

I am so worn out recently
Feeling very hassled
Not getting enough sleep
Lost my appetite
Like I am going to crumble anytime
Should I show it or just conceal these behind that ugly mask or should I not
Don't tell me this is uni life... I will definitely crush that very person who would to tell me this!!!

I am too busy until I can't see the colour of the world...

Beginning of A Day

2008-11-08T11:04:00.004+08:00

Clear blue sky is right on top of me... It's a great start of a day or what? I have no idea. I am still stuck here with my assignments. Making no progress at all though I force myself to sit down and think. And get myself to write something, at least something that is able to make it looks like assignment. Oh my god, what is gotten into my mind recently? I don't know, I guess I am just so pack up with stuffs... Mother's calling everyday to check on me on whether I am studying... Father calls once in a while asking me whether I have forgotten about him and why didn't I call him up... All these make it so not cool to be a grown-up...
I think I have wasted enough time on blogging and now I really have to get into the assignment... again...

The Confession

2008-10-29T22:56:00.003+08:00

~*You let me hold your hand means that you are my gf from now onwards*~

From that day onwards, I am getting to let a new person into my life. A life that is flooded with dreams waiting to be implemented. Little do I know that I will be falling for this very person. He makes me understand that I can lean on someone for a little while. Not to be that untouchable, not to be so protective against others, not to be cold... I learn to smile, at least not show off my serious face so often. He lets me know that it's ok to fall. No doubt he does hurt me once in a while. Why does he do that? According to his 'excuse', he doesn't meant it 'every time'! At least he changes after every session of the 'I-am-sorry' conversation. This is what it really matters, isn't it?

It is not easy to stay in a long-term relationship if no one takes this seriously. It always takes two hands to clap. No one knows when or how will this loving couple be breaking up hence appreciate every moments you shared. It's now or never so those who are still holding on their feelings. Speak out loud, confess, tell the girl you are deeply, madly in love with her. Don't let her wait. It's not a gentleman to let a girl wait. Tell her you love her. There's nothing to be ashamed of!

I love you more than you can imagine. And very sorry for the bads that I have done which hurt you. Thank you for letting me into your life too ^^

This place is called NZX

2008-10-27T14:42:00.009+08:00

The school is going to move to a place called Ara Damansara. We decided to pay the place a visit though we are not sure of the exact location. Off we go and here we are, ending up at the famous shopping centre around this area, the NZX. On a hot and sunny afternoon, we explore ourselves at this newly-built shopping centre. Who are in the team? Read on and you will discover every each of them......

This is an elegant restaurant combined store, I guess elegant is just the word to descride it...

This is what it looks like inside

We are impressed with this building... The only and only Starbucks... What is so impressive about this coffee shop? Well, it is a 3 storey high building standing by itself in the NZX.

They are preparing these for the X-mas and Chinese New Year celebration.

This tree is not as real as it looks like, it is very much fake... It's standing here gracefully while the other plants are so much so facing the possibilities of fading away due to the artwork of mother nature.

C.S.I Season 9

2008-10-15T20:52:00.003+08:00

C.S.I is the one series that I had been enjoying watching since my secondary school... It has always being the all times favourite... Now, the CSIs are back to action again... I have been waiting for so long... I was inspired by the Miniature Killer from season 7... Season 8 surprised me with the relationship between Grissom and Sara... Moreover, it ended with Warrick being shot... I hate that, does it has to end up that way? What a heart-breaking scene it is... Grissom is covered with Warrick's blood, Catherine nearly collapses, Nick looks stunned and the lab transformed to a gloomy atmosphere... I am following this series for so long and I am sure to miss Warrick... Well, you know, I am C.S.I's big time fan... lol...

According to a blog I read, it said that the Miniature Killer is back again and so is Lady Heather... I always have a feeling that Lady Heather has a thing to do with Grissom (this is of personal opinion)... lol... Anyway, C.S.I Season 9 is going to be both worth-waiting and exhilarating!!!

A Long Lost Scene

2008-10-14T12:05:00.002+08:00

I haven't been seeing a rainbow like... don't know how long... It is the symbol of the beauty of mother nature...

All Over Again

2008-10-01T20:52:00.004+08:00

I am stuck with my assignments!!!!!!! This is not new, I am used to get stuck with my assignments... The problem is I don't even know how to get started with them. My head went blank when I look into the questions. Drawings, reference books, my point of view, essays, I know I need these to finish my reports but the question is how do I start. Assignments are killing me. They are my darkest nightmare. They are like boogie man hiding in the dark place... They are just scary!!! They are so scary that I try so hard to avoid them. This sucks a lot!!! I need to put myself together. After all, I am the one who is asking for this. Avoidance and ignorance are not going to help. I need to clear of my mind, take a deep breathe and think. Starting from the very beginning. Ya... starting it all over again.

--End--

The Beginning of a New Sem

2008-09-28T17:45:00.004+08:00

I am always getting nervous every time when new semester starts. Regardless of the new modules I am touching now, assignments truly kill me. There are so much reading awaiting for me in the library and on top of my table. My lecturer told us that, "you guys have no choice but to read... ...". Reading is getting us prepared for our academic reports. I really feel like screaming now!!!

But, there is always a but. I am very x100 lucky to have this lecturer that really help my coursemates and me a lot from from BSC level till now. He said, he is not spoon-feeding us instead he is breast-feeding us. lol. He gives us sample graded 'A' assignment and graded 'D' assignment to let us see the differences. He is guiding us towards a better grade. I truly, deeply respect him from the bottom of my heart. He is great.

Life is not what it meant to be. Life is what we work hard for, life is in our control.

Journey of Love

2008-09-22T00:24:00.006+08:00

I know this will be a long way to go...
I am not very sure whether I can or I shall say we can make it through...
This is between you and me...
Even if many people do come along in our life...
Will you change or will i change?
This is not the main issue...
What it really matter is that whether our love is strong enough to put us through...
Trespassers are unforgivable, neither do we know that they are not to be blamed for if the love is strong enough, nothing on earth would break the love apart...
What is keeping the passion between relationship?
This is not for anyone to judge...
Time can cure heart breaks...
After all that you had told me, I finally realized how much you truly care...
Before this, little do I know that you take the small details seriously...
Now, I just want to tell you that I am lucky to have you...

Friendship Update**

2008-09-21T22:30:00.009+08:00

Friends come and go.
But not every of them will understand you and be there when you need someone to talk to. You might not be able to meet very often but you just now that they are always there in your heart whenever you need them. I am really happy and lucky to have you...
Thank you, friends...

2 of the main characters of the one and only 135 story, someone's missing...

Irene & I

My new friend, Ethan Hii & I

Yuk Wei & I

Friends Forever

Friendship's expiry date... Eternity

The Best Place on Earth

2008-09-04T09:52:00.006+08:00

I am finally home... Home is always warm and welcoming, unlike other places where I've been. My mum is getting thinner and I even weight more than she does right now. Those who know me probably know my weight, image other that weight less than I do, unbelievable... Actually I've gain some weight but is still at a standard level... haha...

My brother is going to facing his most important examination of his life and I am pretty worried for him as my mum said he's not doing well in his previous examinations. Thus, my mission is too get him prepare for the coming exam... I really do hope that I can give him some help... Just to pass my holiday, being a personal tutor for my little brother...

I am not quite familiar with the household equipment at home. For instance, last night I put my clothes into the washing machine and I asked if there're no more clothes I would start the machine, then I was wandering why the washing machine is only filled with my clothes. My dad saw it, then he said never mind you just put your clothes there, the machine will wash for you...
Actually, that machine is broken... Then I end up gathered all my clothes again and put them into the other washing machine which is in good condition...

Sometimes, funny things do happen. And I enjoy being amused and be amused.

A Place Where It's Ok To Dream Again

2008-09-01T13:48:00.006+08:00

A sudden feeling hits me these days, the feeling of lost, I felt empty. It's like when you meet up with a long lost friend(who once to be your best friend), you will feel uncertain, you will feel something's missing. Maybe you used to have a lot of common topics to discuss but now those topics just seem weird, tedious or even childish. The gathering that you have been craving for all those days turn out to be unpleasant. Disappointing and miserable kept swirling in your thoughts. And eventually, you just give up even to think about it.

But, luckily I have always have a very best friend of mine who always awaits for my return. For now, if anyone ask me, where is your favourite place to be, my answer would be 'Home'. Someone's always there waiting for my return. We share the same topic, she has the same old passion for me no matter when and what happen. My home is full of laughter everyday. The only place on earth that is warm and pleasant to be inhabited for me. I stick with my parents a lot. Maybe because I have been away from home for over 4 years. Though I have a lot of other good friends, it's just don't feel the same. Maybe because Mother and I share the same principal and motto. Or maybe just purely because I miss home too much. Not that I enjoy being away from home but it's because I still need to pursue my dreams... My mother thinks that I am being too ambitious sometimes... Isn't it a good thing to be ambitious than dreadful at times? Just kidding.

Despite the long hours wasted on the journey to the airport, at least for now, home is still my favourite hideout.The place where it is ok to dream again.

-Shang Villa-

2008-08-28T16:33:00.008+08:00

This is the place where I stay right now... An old condo, in a nearly outskirt area at Petaling Jaya... You have to take lrt to reach here and it's the last stop called Kelana Jaya... The nearest hypermarket here is Giant...No entertainment at all here.... Nothing much to eat, you can't find food to eat on weekends... If you happen to be a chinese, longing to have some chinese food, very sorry, it's all malay meal served here... the only chinese meal here is the economic rice, open for business only on weekdays... But there is one good thing about here, it's peaceful... No crimes... Here are some pictures of the place I stay...

It looks like a huanted old condo, here is where I stay.-> Shang Villa

The @#%$ lift has been broken down for more than a month now!!! The management here takes no action at all... Just last 2 weeks ago, I was stuck in the lift with a tenant here !!! Scary, she pressed the alarm but no security persons seem to notice someone was stuck in the lift!!! Then we have to open the lift door with our bare hands!!!

The water pressure here is @#$% low!!! I have to fill up the bucket everytime when I want to take my shower... TROUBLESOME!!! And one more thing, the sink is blocked... Due to the dirty and disgusting scenery, no picture is taken... Now, I have to brush my teeth and wash my face at the bath tub... PROBLEMATIC!!!

This interesting plant that looks like clover grow here... We called it the '3-leaved clover'... This condo is not that bad after all...