Without Vince's Companion Day 131

I'm counting down the days now... I will be going to further my study during May... my feelings are a bit complex, agitated, nervous but most of all i m very glad to be able to study... i m pretty looking forward to get away from here ( the place where i work now)... why?? Because i have nothing to do everyday, i m sitting here growing fungus everyday... The worst thing about working is that u have nothing to do at all the whole day... Frankly speaking, i don't like working here... i don't like the working environment here... ya ya i know it's not stressful but it's too free here... it seems like i can get my salary just sitting on my seat... i don't want to get my salary for free... i want to learn something before i go out to study again... i m complaining to be too free to my loving mother everyday... i thought she would be tired of hearing that but suprisingly she is not and she will never be tired or bored to hear me out... my most adoring mother is wandering why is that her daughter likes to study so much... u know why?? study is good cos i do not have to get up very early every morning and the classes are not on for everyday... And most important of all i get a really caring call every morning asking how do u feel today... is everything going fine... My mum calls me every morning just to check that i m ok and everything is running smoothly... and we would end our conversation with a sweet 'love you'... and now that i'm at home, she would hug me the way ppl hug a small kid... i will have my legs wrapping her waist... haha cool right?! she would always ask me to sleep in her arms... i will do that but just for a few minutes cos i like to move around... i just told my mum last night that i have been writing in a blog, and i told her when i go out at May, she can visit my blog to see what is actually going on with me and i have been up to... i want to say something to her, something very old fashion but yet touching...

"Dear Mother if next birth i were to be given a choice, i will choice to be your one and only daughter. I Love You"

Without Vince's Companion Day 125

-LeaRning hOw tO LeT gO-
Finally, i can online... the connection works... I m so not doing well... Human being is a very dangerous kind of creature... u never now what they think and what they might do to u... Some ppl might juz do something unexpectedly evil like hurting someone with no reasons at all or with the so call 'reason' that cannot be excepted by most others. Seeing u being hurt make them happy... u will never understand them and if one day u understand why they did that, u might become one of them... they never think they are the one with problems... they are the most good-looking, most brilliant, most friendly, most of every combination of the best... when u really think that someone is a good guy but actually he/she is not, and still u try to defend them... it really sucks a lot when u get to know that they did something behind ur back... when this happens u will start asking urself, 'what is friend for?', 'what's wrong with me?', 'is there something i did that truly pissed him/her off?', 'did i say something wrong?'... tonnes and tonnes of questions start to flow over ur mind... u cannot stop thinking why does that someone would ever want to hurt u... being hurt really sucks!! the most hurting part is that u get to know it from others and u are far apart... there are a lots of unexpected, so now i m learning how to let go...