Without Vincent's Companion Day 50

I ll be sitting for my final exam tomorrow morning at this time... i hv been preparing for this coming exam for weeks and i really want to get it done with... 2 days of exam and i ll be free then... i m looking forward to go shopping after this exam... thinking of it making me feel great!!! but i hv limited budget to buy thing... never mind i juz wan to enjoy the feel of shopping... i can go home eventually... now that i typed this word (eventually) i suddenly tot of my mum... she ll say this word every time after i said 'finally' ... haha... miss her so much... miss home like hell... exams make me sick... juz hope tat tomorrow everything ll run smoothly... at least i hope that the questions will be wat i expected... wish for the best!!!

Without Vince's Companion Day 45

~Unexpected Birthday Gift~

this gift is from yjia... thank u dear... i was both pleased and surprised... this is meaningful n i promise u, i ll cherish it forever... miss ur handwriting so much, i m least expected to see such familiar handwriting over here... i don't hv a sister so i see u, irene n cindy as my sisters and i m really glad to have u gals with me... we hd been through happy n sad times... we shed our tears not in front of each other but in front of our 'daddy'... haha... sure he's having most of his time thinking how to get a smile on his daugthers' faces... miss those times at sibu so much... miss u so muchhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...

*the card*

*the handwriting*





*the key chain to-my-heart*

Without Vince's Companion Day 38

i am such a moron!!! i am too careless to let other ppl copy my work!!! i m angry ... angry of myself for being so stupid!!! i should have check my handy drive before i lend it to others and i should hv copy the senior's work to other instead of mine !!! i shouldn't hv trust them!!! i m too stupid!!! there's no use blaming myself now, i know... juz hope tat everything will be fine... i hate exam times!!! I AM STUPID!!! and pls don come to me during study weeks asking me what should u study!!! i m nt the one setting the exam papers !!! if i were to be the one setting the papers sure i ll set the questions far from wat u hv expected!!! these ppl make me sick and tired!!! maybe i m being sellfish and self-centred but hey guys pls be a bit considerable ... u need to study, i don't?! I AM A MORON for being nice !!! i ll try to learn from tis!!! i hope...

Without Vince's Companion Day 32

I can't sleep... I've been very moody these few days... i am worried... worried about exam, worried about my honour year intake... worried about us... maybe i think too much but lately i juz don't feel right, I don't know what to do... I am so lost... Am i not strong enough? Am i not capable enough to handle things happening around me? Am i not sensitive enough to sense the changing of atmosphere around me? Am i not brave enough to face the consequences? Or am i juz don't have the enthusiasm to move on with my life now? I've a wish now... I wish the January intake for honours degree will open next year and i can finish my study smoothly and most importantly i wish to see you next year... if there ain't January intake but at least i hope that Dad and Mummy would let me work at KL... that way i don't have to come here again in Sept... and the bottom line is that i want to see u... i am not crossing the line, am I? I haven't seen u for almost half a year and i really do miss u like hell... i want to see u in person not jux talking to u through the phone... i really don't know how long i can still take this... I feel like I m about to fall apart... being unable to see u next year is NOT the thing i expected... Am i being too greedy if i juz wish to see u next year? sometimes... u juz don't know how i feel... u din treat me well when we first got together... but now u r doing juz fine... u always tell me that u r a lousy bf... sometimes... u r, juz wan to let u know that i hate GANDUM!! and u know why... i don't wan to be alone no more... sometimes i am afraid and when i look around and there is no one beside me, i feel horrible... i need u to be with me and i hope my wish will come true...

Without Vince's Companion Day 26

i have been doing my assignment for 2 weeks... i haven finish it yet n now that i've only left a bit but i am lazy to proceed... moreover everybody is asking me for answers for the past year questions... i am tired already guyZZZ... please give me a break... at least for a day or two... now how i wish u r here... at least i still have someone to speak to... yes, yes, yes... i know we speak every night but through our phones, not in person... hw i miss those days... Assignment submission date is 24th of tis month and the exam begins on the 3rd of december... need to finish off my assignment first then only i can concentrate on the revision...
i haven gone home for like 6 months... Mother misses me like hell... she told me once, i think i few days back, that 'u must come home o... mummy is waiting for u... u must come home o...' my heart melt when i hear that... i m the only daugther and i know just how much she wants to keep me all to herself and by her side for always... me away from her is just the last thing that is in her mind... though we are not with each other now, she can still always read my mind... i know she meant something when she insisted me to go home... she knows what is in my mind... she just knows that i ll tell her i wan to stay at kl and find a job here and wait for the september intake for the honours degree... Mummy, sorry... i under estimate u for once... i won't from now on... miss home so much... miss u so much...

Without Vince's Companion Day 1

today is the 1st day i start to write on this page... i m fine today, it's raining outside... i told vince last night tat i ll write a blog with tis title... actually tis is nt the first day without his companion, it has been almost a year... we are far apart n i miss him deeply everyday... he told me he ll be coming here to study next year n i m very pleased to hear tat as we can be together finally... but... there's always but... last few months i got to know tat maybe there ll not be january intake for honours degree n tat means tat we have to be apart again... i can't continue my honours degree january next year n i have to wait until september next year then we ll be separate for another year... i m tired of being apart with him but i have no choice... who don't wish to be with their loved ones forever but vince told me there's no such thing called 'eternity'... 'eternity' is not true, 'eternity' is a lie, 'eternity' is not meant to be... he said someday he ll leave me to a far away place like my Grandmother... however he also told me tat 'eternity' is a place where 2 couple who truly love each other may reached... i hope we can reach 'eternity'